Wait for It
Patience has never been my strongest trait. In this season of life I am often gripped by an irresistible urge to just get away. Where? Just somewhere where I can have a different purpose than that so clearly laid at my feet. I find myself pondering wistfully how wonderful it will be when the kids are just a few years older. Years! I’m practically wishing their childhood away. Because it is HARD. It is hard to submit myself to these little people every single day. I am needed. I am essential. I am like the air they breathe right now.
It’s normal to crave comfort and ease. But the truth is that Godly character is formed so often through the “hard stuff”.
“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3 because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. 4 Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” James 1:2-4
Pure joy. That’s a tall order. But we know that Christ gives us peace that surpasses understanding and that there is joy in drawing close to Him and in Him alone.
The impatience that so often grips me is one of desiring a different stage of life that will allow me more independence and a different purpose in life beyond motherhood. As if motherhood isn’t enough. As if it isn’t clear exactly what I am supposed to be doing right now. No. It is clear, I am just focusing and pouring myself into tomorrow instead of today. Of course I feel restless. Of course I feel discontented.
The reality of it is that this is a season. Seasons change. Yet I am so unwilling to wait for it. It will come all on its own through no effort on my part. It is hard right now in the trenches of infant and toddlerhood. But what if this time is meant to refine me, refine us (my fellow mothers and fathers) for something yet unseen?
So, that is the task before me: to live these days joyfully and purposefully that my joy in obedience will overflow into everything else that I do. Through Christ, we can find joy in the trials. Though we may be weak, He is strong. His grace IS sufficient. Praise the Lord!!